


With This Bullet

by J (j_writes)



Category: Sports Night
Genre: Alternate Universe - Spy, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-07-31
Updated: 2011-07-31
Packaged: 2017-10-22 01:21:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/232145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/j_writes/pseuds/J
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He had never intended to become a spy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	With This Bullet

**Author's Note:**

> written for Phoebesmum for SN Holidays 2008.

When Dan Rydell was eighteen years old, his brother was killed.

In another life, Sam might have died in a car accident, or of a drug overdose, or in a million other mundane ways that Dan wouldn't have to blame himself for. In this life, Sam died because he was a part of the Resistance.

 _You can inspire all the revolution you want out on the street_ , their father said. _But here in my house, that kind of speech will not be tolerated._

Sam listened anyway. He listened, and he joined, and he died.

And Dan was entirely to blame.  
______________

Isaac Jaffee was the one who took him in when he left home, and the one his parents once accused of luring him with tricks.

 _He never needed any tricks, he was just right_ , Dan told them, but they never quite believed him.

Isaac opened his home and his expertise to Dan, and by the time Dan was ready to start making a name for himself in the Resistance, he had acquired a wealth of knowledge that could only have been gained from a lifetime of observing the world and living a life designed to change the way things were.  
______________

He had never intended to become a spy. It happened naturally, someone finding him, telling him that maybe with his brain, with his way of reading people and his effortless charm, he could be the kind of person the Government was looking for.

It was easy, infiltrating. He was hired nearly immediately, because Dana had been right. He was exactly what they wanted, what they were searching schools all over the country for.

As far as his superiors were concerned, Dan Rydell was the ideal Government employee.

He was just also a spy for the people trying to overthrow them.  
______________

It had never been about the boys, not really.

In the beginning, it had been about principles, and after that it was about Sam. It had never been about the fact that the Government had outlawed him, the people who did the things that he did.

There were places, and if you knew the right people—which Dan always did—you could go there and find others, no questions asked, no messy connections, just brief meaningless casual sex, hands and mouths and bodies pressing together in dimly lit back rooms.

It wasn't _about_ that, but it strengthened his resolve to change things.  
______________

The first time Dan held a gun was the night he first met with his contact.

 _These are our people_ , Isaac told him, _but things go wrong._

He rested the cool metal in Dan's hands, watching as Dan wrapped his fingers around it carefully, hesitantly.

 _This gun has saved my life,_ Isaac told him. _But my life isn't the one that needs saving anymore. I'm just the eyes and the brain now. You are the hands._

Dan looked down at the gun warming against his skin, and he wished that he lived a life where it would not be necessary.  
______________

Their team ran smoothly, and was considered one of the elite.

Following Isaac's guidance, but sworn not to contact him, Dan lived the life of a Government agent, perfect in every way but a few, because an employee without any vices would come under suspicion almost immediately.

Natalie was the runner, the dispatcher, in charge of sharing information, and she relied on Jeremy's technical expertise to do it. Dana planned. She plotted and she schemed, and she found new blood, like she had found Dan.

Casey was his contact. Casey was the only link he had left to this world.  
______________

They met sporadically, at times that were undoubtedly orchestrated by Isaac, but which looked random to untrained eyes.

They met on the street, pretending to be old friends catching up, new acquaintances getting to know each other better, business partners talking about their clients.

They spoke in code, in their own language known only to the two of them.

Sometimes, every once in a while, they met in hotel rooms, not at times chosen by Isaac, but on their own time, their own money.

It was a risk, one Dan had been trained not to take. He took it anyway.  
______________

It was Casey who got caught. It was rarely the agents undercover who were discovered, because the Government hated going after their own. Instead it was the contacts, the ones on their own who were captured.

One day Dan arrived at the meeting place and Casey wasn't there.

That was how he knew. Casey had never missed a meeting, not once in all their years together.

There was a note waiting for him in his office when he got back. _Don't do anything stupid_ , it said in Isaac's writing.

Dan went home and opened the drawer that held Isaac's gun.  
______________

 _You don't get to return_ was one of the first things that Isaac ever told him. _There is a plan. It's expertly designed and any deviation could cause your death or the death of your team members. We do not put our people in unnecessary danger. Those who go rogue don't return._

Dan found Casey, but he didn't go back. He didn't try to find Isaac, and he didn't go to Natalie, or Dana, or Jeremy. He took Casey and he ran, and he didn't look back.

He cared for Casey's injuries himself, hiding him away in a roadside motel.  
______________

They found a new city, a new team, new identities. Splitting up was not an option. They sourced themselves out as partners, but now Dan was the contact and Casey was the one looking for a Government job.

They fought about it, long and hard, and as their fights usually do, it turned into sex, Dan on his knees in front of Casey, pushing him back against the wall by his hips as he swallowed around him. After, he leaned up, tracing his lips over Casey's scars.

 _I won't lose you again_ , he said, and his eyes allowed no argument.


End file.
